ABC's
Fun and Parenting At Risk Kids

We apologize that this site is still under construction, it will always be added to...any ideas e-mail jodee@connetworks.com

A - After School Ideas

1. Snack Bags - Buy snacks in large quantity and have the kids pack into small ziplock baggies for the whole month. Kids can come home and pick up their daily snack. This idea is also great for lunches or school snacks you save a bundle. My kids like to mix and match and make a GORP bag of goodies and I get to make sure everything inside is nutritious.

B - Before School Ideas

1. Breakfast - Set the breakfast table while dishes are being done for supper. Leave out the cereal chosen for the next day.
2. Fruit to Go - We make a morning energy drink with fresh fruit, vitamin C, flax seeds and ice in the blender. We make enough to freeze some for afterschool treats. Recipes available.
3. School Lunches - Make school lunches before bedtime.
4. School Clothes  - Lay school clothes out the night before. We tried dressing a pretend child for school by laying the clothes, socks, shoes, school bag out on an throw rug with a fabric painted outline...we thought it would work great but this never worked for our FAS child...she decided to sleep in her clothes so it wouldn't be a hassle in the morning -- we by as much wrinkle free as we can! ...We also tried picking clothes for the week out on Sunday matched to days...This might work for you...Sleeping in her clothes worked for us....whew! I share this to let you know there are some battles not worth fighting.
5. Get To Know The Crew at the Stop Picnic - Pack up a picnic breakfast for one of the first days of school to share with the kids at the stop. Invite the parents and let them know if you're a McGruff House. Share phone numbers and get to know each other.

C - Creative Chores

1. Trade weeks. Dishes one week. Food clean up one week. Trash one week. Sweeping one week. This way all kids get a turn at all jobs.
2. Cooking and cleaning. Whoever cooks doesn't have to clean up -- mom always likes this one...But I am sensitive to major messes and help when cooking is extensive...Special dinners mean everyone pitches in.
3. Chore jar - "Mom can you take me to....." My time is valuable too and though I love the discussions we have in the car and the intimate one on one time these experiences bring I need support. So when the MOM CAN YA...comes around I ask them to pick something out of the Chore jar....sweep steps, sweep sidewalk, wash bathroom sink. fluff pillows on couch, bring laundry upstairs...etc.

D - Discipline

1. The dining room table is our safe place for discussion. Any child bringing a transgression to the table is forgiven and discipline is often waved for honestly or the child determines their own discipline. The goal of the table is to acknowledge poor choices, reflect and institute a program of change. Even a three year old has been able to use this effectively.
2. Honesty is encouraged never punished. When honesty and truth prevail we deal with what is the next step to not let it happen again.
3. Handwriting, math problems, letters of apology, memorization and reports are always valid when rules are broken and they have always proven successful..

E- Education Helps

1. Visit our families "Great Ideas" to help kids learn
2. When teaching something for the first time follow this program
   Tell and show - You tell and show the student how to do something the student watches and listens only.
   Tell and do - You tell the student and again and they do it with you
   Show and do - The student shows and tells you how to do it.
3. Alphabet Collection (for ages 2-12) :
   We keep an Alphabet Collection in 26 little plastic containers from the deli and put sticky letters on each one. We spent 4 years collecting little things from the alphabet.
   For example the "E" container has a toy elephant, elf, eraser, eel.
   We've used this collection for many things, naming objects, spelling, poetry, memorizing and writing stories.

F - Family Time

1. Camping - Is always a great way to get away from the day to day home issues and discover adventures in hiking, canoeing, whitewater, boating, exploring, biking.
2. Movie Night - A couple of times a month we enjoy a movie and dinner in front of the television. Usually the dinner is planned and prepared by all.
3. One Hour Cleaning Frenzy - Our days are busy...so when things get out of control we put initiate the One Hour Cleaning Frenzy....moving every thing back to its correct rooms, getting all the machines (dishwasher, laundry, bread machine, oven) all working together for us.
4. Bring a Friend - When we go on a weekend camping adventure a few extra young people doesn't really make any difference and provides parents relaxation. So we load and go. This is expecially helpful during those middle years 10-15.
5. Drive Me Crazy - When our new exchange student arrive we like to drive them crazy by showing them all the silly USA drive-ups....We pop some popcorn and start by driving to the bank, drive up to a fast food place and finish off at the drive in movie.
6. Welcome Home Dinner - When a new young person arrives in our home we make our first excursion out to the largest buffet (Old Country Buffet) we can find. Mom and dad get an idea of what the child likes to eat, how much they eat and what table manners we will be dealing with. Also the first meal is on nuetral ground and allows for easier beginning safe conversation.

G - Grades

1. Kingdom Grades - In our homeschool we give four grades for work done by our students
   1 - Creativity,
   1 - Accuracy and Thinking skills,
   1 - Neatness and
   1 - Attitude.
   This gives the opportunity to get FOUR "A"'s and it also allows the child to know where improvement is needed.   Each A fits into one corner of the CROSS, +
2. Quarterly report cards turned into the public school have two grades:
   P=Progressing in knowledge and
   M=Mastered knowledge
   Most things we progress in...we master spelling, handwriting, memorization and math

H - Hugs and Kisses

1. We have lots of kinds of hugs and kisses for our special kids. Some of them dislike touching in anyway to we have discovered creative ways to physically show we care, while not invading their own personal boundaries.
   Butterfly Kisses - flashing eyelashes on their cheeks
   Big Daddy Bear Hug - Holding around their shoulders and quietly growling by their ear "I like you so much I could eat you up"
   Love Battery Recharge - sitting very quietly in a chair with a blanket around the child have them hold you and close their eyes to fill their love batteries up until the love pops out of the head and can be shared with others....we start by filling up the pinky toes....this can take a long time if the tank is on empty.

I - Independence Earned

1. Teen Passport - 13-year-old's receive a teen passport for stamps of approval for their journey to adult independence.
2. Driver's License - 1000 miles logged before a driver's license
3. Call when you get there or you can't go back.

J - Just Fun

1. Click here for FREE PATTERNS for Fashion Dolls Clothes. Full Christian costuming for Barbie, Ken, Skipper and Kelly. Helps you work with Sunday School Drama and acting out stories, a great conversion for the dolls and adds another dimension for children who play with these toys.

2. Summer Tie Dye Day. Every year mom lets a group of us tie dye white t-shirts, socks, tennis and jeans in the colors we choose. We wait till the big white sale is on at the store, and then we collect all the old white clothes no one wants anymore. We fill up our kid swimming pool to rinse off the shirts. Mom buys and mixes the dye and then puts it in spray bottles so we don't get so messy. We use strings and rubber bands to make designs and special folding.

3.  Airplane Tree House We live right on the Crystal Airport so my mom and dad designed a treehouse that looks like an airplane. It is big enough for sleepovers, wing walking and adventures where ever our imaginations can take us.

4. Paper Airplanes. visit www.paperairplanes.co.uk.html for ideas all you need is a little paper.

K - Keepsakes

1. Mother-Daughter Commitment Ring - When our daughter matured we gave her a mother/daughter ring as a commitment to purity and remembering that I am with her in her heart and her mind. If she is every faced with a situation that is heading toward out of control ....she can use the ring as a remembrance to flee danger and use her parents as the excuse.

L - Lifebooks

1. Lifebooks - Memories in our home last forever for young people when they are given life books. We keep the books simple and small and easy to carry on to new and different places. We add photos and drawings, stories and recipes whatever is important to the young person while they share our home.
2. CD year book. During the year our exchange students share our home we help them create a webb homepage of the exciting, funny, disasterous, happy, clever and ridiculous things that have happened to them in America and our home. This allows family and friends to see what is happening quickly. We also provide an e-mail address to they can get mail from abroad easily...When they leave for home we write a copy of the files to a permanent CD.
3. Travel books. When we go on a trip we purchase little blank books for our young people to color, draw, add postcards, poetry. Get addresses and autographs so they have a documentation of their trip.

M

N - Nice to Others

1. Neighbors in Need - We snowplow, lawnmow and weed for our elderly neighbors. And in return besides the good feelings, smiles and hugs we've received....we've been blessed with great cookies, pieces of homemade pie and lemonades.
2. Care Boxes - When we outgrow good clothing, toys or educational materials. We wrap up and ship them to our extended family and friends with younger children.
3. Shoe Boxes - At Christmas we make shoeboxes for children and families in foreign countries usually adding pencils, sharpeners, notebooks, small toys, watercolors, small seed packages, thread and needles, bandaids, shoelaces, cards, gum, candy, etc.
4. Clearance Time - When winter clearances hit Minnesota we purchase extras at the 70% off to give to charities the following winter.

O - Other Days

1. Other Days - Celebrate Mother's Day Eve and Father's Day Eve in honor of your children's birth parents. Make a special dinner or bake a cake or make a special treat you can eat the next day too. Don't forget the Other Days along with the days you celebrate.

P - Problem Solvers

1. Lying - We encourage honesty and reward honesty even if the offense was great. When a child has shown the courage to be honest we claim Kingdom Victory and they get to drink their dinner beverage from the Cup of Valor.
2. Stealing - Any stealing behavior is repaid 2 times.

Qu - Quality Counts

1. Overcoming Plate - Meet a challenge, score points in the game, get a great test score, celebrate a birthday, Mother's Day, Father's day, learning to ride a bike, catching the biggest fish...There is only one of these fancy plates and it goes to the person being honored.
2. Cup of Valor - Use courage, show bravery, overcome an emotional temptations, bear a truth - you drink from the cup of honor.
3. Favor Bracelet - Everyone needs favors, but everyone does not always do them. To encourage kindness to each other a favor bracelet, necklace or key can be passed around. Draw names to see who gets to start the key and let it circulate around the family. You can begin the favor trinket new each morning or let it circulate.

R - Rules

KULP FAMILY RULES

Respect each other
Treat Animals lovingly
Have fun and learn new things everyday
Its OK to make mistakes
Everyone has jobs
Own your own behavior
Tell the truth
Share

IF YOU DROP IT....Pick it up
IF YOU BREAK IT...Tell someone and Fix it
IF IT CRIES...Hug it
IF YOU HURT SOMEONE...Make amends

The table is always a SAFE place to discuss problems.

WORLD RULES

S - Safety

1. Secret signals:
   You are being disrespectful and I'd rather not embarras you. So I tweek my nose and if the behavior stops, smile and nothing is said. If two nose tweeks happens...I speak out on the poor behavior.
   I don't feel safe and I need you to come and get me. My daughter just says "Oh my head itches" and I quick find something I need her to come right home and do or stay with me.
2. Night Life: On our bathroom counter in a well lit fish bowl lives our pet Tiffany the Beta Siamese fighting fish who fights for little children's safety when they get up to go potty in the middle of the night.
3. No Questions Asked: When our teens go out I make sure they have phone call money or know how to call 1-800-Collect. I offer to come and get them anyplace, at anytime with no questions asked. In 22 years of raising teens (foster care, adoption and exchange students) I have gone out quite a few times....no questions asked. Usually my car fills up with other teens not wanting to stay in a bad situation and within 5 minutes when everyone is warm and safe I get to hear the whole story withour ever saying a word.

T

U - Use It Different

1. Boxes become playhouses, cars, garages, doll houses or airplane hangers. See how many things your children can recycle into creative ideas. 

2. Jack-in-the Box - Sing Pop goes the weasel and let the child hide in the box and be the jack in the box

3. Blanket Camping - Rig a tent using blankets, chairs and sofa cushions

4. Train Gang - Line up all 

5. Noodle Art Make create mosaics or string them for necklaces

6.  

V - Violence Patrol

1. We let the young people know that their GANG is their family.
2. Any act of violence in our home has to be repaid with an act of kindness.
3. Conflict must be completed full circle before left. We believe family is the place to teach conflict resolution skills.  No one every goes to bed angry.

W - Worth The Time

1. Advent Boxes  - When December rolls around we collect books and small family items and wrap each with a Bible Verse and send the box off to neices and nephews for holiday giving. Each day they enjoy a new surprise. Some things are new, some are used.
2. Secret Pals - When a new kid moves in a significant person to us becomes a "secret pal" sending little cards and notes. When the child goes back home, the person lets the child know who he/she was.

X - Excitement Excitement

YZ - Yearly Ztuff Yearly Ztuff

1. The year in Minnesota provides us lots of seasons to enjoy different things. The best times have become traditions and we repeat these experiences year after year. Take our ideas and create 4 family memory weeks for your family. None of these are expensive weekends, just lots of laughs, love and memories. Visit some of our adventures on Staffan's site.
   Fall Weekend - Weekend Apple picking at the Kastes Organic Apple Orchard, Camping and Biking along the Mississippi river valleys, hiking in the hills, visiting Ice Cream factories, cheese factories, roadside stands and sausage making shops. We enjoy the next week carving pumpkins, making Argentine Pumpkin Stew and bringing the plants in for the winter.
   Winter Weekend - Weekend of snowmobiling and ice fishing. Making snowmen and ladies. Reading good books, hot tubs, cross country skiing and snuggling in front of a warm fire with warm drinks, popcorn and movies.
   Spring Weekend - A drive to Lake Superior before tourist time, visiting the wonderful nurseries, walking along the North Shore Hiking Trails, throwing rocks in the lake and feeding bread to the seagulls, watching the ships come in the harbor, enjoying grandma's cooking and grandpa's trains while dad golfs.
   Summer Weekend - Salmon fishing on Lake Michigan and airplanes at Oshkosh kick off a great time of eating at fish boils and getting dried cherries from Door County.